A Sterling Day!

Escape From the Red Snake!

I’ve been going to my post box every day anxiously awaiting the delivery of one of those many items I order through the mail. But this is no ordinary parcel, at least, not to me. Major metaphors involved!

When I became diabetic at age 13, the whole big scary ordeal necessitated my wearing a medic alert bracelet to draw further attention to the fact. Now, to a teenager who had been forever fascinated with anything shiny that even resembled jewelry, (was I related to the crow family?!) this little "bangle" was a huge disappointment!

This newest addition to my "pearls of possession collection" wasn’t exactly a real gem. Well, the information engraved was unique and I’ve always loved being unique but it was made of stainless steel for goodness sake! Serviceable, durable and ugly in the extreme!

The first element anyone would notice was a gigantic, deep red snake wrapped around what looked like a sword to me. (Was this detail to cruelly remind us of the numerous injections we were to do over a lifetime?!) The comment I remember most was from a girl in my Gr. 9 class who yelled out in her loudest voice, "What a ZAP bracelet!" (Same girl that announced to the entire student population in her signature disgusted tone and human megaphone on my first day back to school in four months, "Ooh! Why are you SO SKINNY?!)

I was relieved to find that after a few months, wear and tear allowed the red snake to slowly flake off. Well, you can bet I hastened that process along with a sharp paring knife!

Did I say these babies were durable? Well, in actual fact I’ve had about 15 break, get fixed, break again and so on…. I found one buried in the snow, on the driveway after spring thaw, in my bed and in the bathtub. But the most ironic place of uncovering has to be at the summer camp for diabetic kids where I worked for 8 years.

The following summer after losing it, I found it during a game of "Capture the Flag" while I was hiding out at the incinerator!! I bet there were many snake zap bracelets lost on the campground – on the bottom of the lake, under the dock, in canoes, in the horse barn, at the archery field, the campfire ring, the Chapel site…just about everywhere.

I imagine a million years from now, that some archaeologists will be digging, wondering why the heck all these bracelets are buried there. Then they’ll piece it together once they find all the syringes in the dumpsite! (These camp days were way before environmentally friendly disposal!)

Which brings me to the Sterling part of my story…. I have always looked wistfully at the gold and silver versions of these bracelets on the re-order forms, thinking they were just too much of a luxury for me to spend more money on than was absolutely necessary.

Well, guess what? After 38 years with a red snake on my wrist, I decided that it was worth…..that I was worth it!

Today it arrived in a box you’d swear was from Birks! (Okay, maybe that was just my enthusiastic imagination and keen anticipation at work!) It is like a pretty piece of real jewelry, smaller and a great deal shinier than the standard stainless! (A crow would be proud to wear it!) Even the chain is fine and delicate……$85 of Snake Power Zap!

Worth every cent.


Mother of Invention, gazing at her new wristwear, gleaming in the sun.